TODAY WAS A DAY OF GAMES. THE GAMES I PLAYED ARE DISPLAYED BEFORE EE.

One.
Are you female? If so are you reading this? why are you reading this? Are you skinny? are you pale? have you little to no self esteem? Do people find you a bit stupid? Do you wear glasses and go out with your friends who you believe are much better looking than you? Do they get hit on by scally bellends while you sit in the corner waiting, hoping, for a real man... a gentleman even.... to come and chase the clouds away from your life. To make it all ok, to feel a certain closeness with, to curl up on the couch in your jammies with and watch bridget jones with while drinking a bottle of that nice wine you found in asda for about 7 quid? Do you want to spend saturday night poised in front of x factor with this guy, knowing he will always care for you no matter what? That he loves you unconditionally and that come hell or high water, he would crawl through broken glass just to make you smile?

I used to be that guy. Now i'm not. Go fuck yourself you nasty walking trap.

Two.
TODAY GAMES WERE DEVISED WHILST WORKING ON MAH JOB. GAME THE FIRST. IT IS A PENIS GAME. YOU REPLACE ONE WORD OF A MOVIE, ALBUM OR VIDEO GAME TITLE WITH THE WORD PENIS. HERE BE EXAMPLES.

1. Pirates of the carribean: The curse of the black penis.
2. Don't tell mom he babysitter's penis.
3. Bill and Ted's Bogus Penis.
4. Mary Shelley's Penis
5. Star Wars episode 1; the phantom penis
6. City Slickers 2; the legend of curly's penis.
7. Indiana Jones and the kingdom of the Crystal Penis
8. one flew over the cookoo's penis
9. full metal penis
10. it's a wonderful penis
11. penis of arabia
12. requiem for a penis
13. eternal sunshine of the spotless penis
14. penis cassidy and the sundance kid
15. let the right penis in

Right so thats what i did today, a friend and i also sang the subtitles of the jeremy kyle show opera style lending a more highbrow air to proceedings. that was a laugh that.

Later peeps.